Friday, 31 December 2010






Edit, 01/01/11:


Did you have a good new year! I hope you did. I went to a party with some Germans and spent the whole night stringing a load of party poppers together into one multipopper and making a helmet out of party hats:

So this film! I made this film. I haven't made any personal films in a while so it was nice, even if it's a bit too long and the references are a little obscure I hope some people like it.

There are several reasons I wanted to to this. Basically I completely love Fallout 3. I've never played any RPGs before, and Fallout purists may sneer at me when I say I haven't played the previous games, but honestly even before the recent ones came out I was really into the story of the old ones - Fallout 1 has one of the best game intros ever in my opinion, as well as a really fantastic final boss [spoilers]. Fallout 3 is great, it made you feel like the main character in some sort of crossover between Mad Max and a sci-fi episodes of the Twilight Zone, plus it's the only game I can think of that lets you blow up punks, zombies, tin toy robots, giant scorpions and some distant relative of Satan. I've probably played well over 100 hours of it, just got New Vegas and already love it.

Also, I'm not sure if I've made this clear, but I really like 28 Days Later. It has this slightly deceptive mix of high budget filmmaking and low budget techniques, and the first time I watched it it made me feel like I could pick up a MiniDV camera and make something that looked just as good. One of the things I like about it the most were the empty London shots, and how they was achieved largely by filming very early in the morning, (I also like this in contrast to a similar scene from Vanilla Sky with an empty Times Square, when they presumably spent a lot more money for the same effect). It's something I've always wanted an excuse to do.

Also my brother has a girlfriend called Sonia, who has a birthday today (happy birthday Sonia!) which made me think about the sort of party you could have. One new year's day several years ago I spent the hours between about 10am and noon waiting at a train station for a girl who never turned up, and it made me realise how empty everything was when the world has a hangover.

So everything sort of clicked and we managed to make this. Thanks so much to everyone that was involved! It was really tough getting people, we filmed it the weekend before Christmas, and the people who weren't doing pre-Christmas things were stuck in the sudden snowfall. We had a panicky moment when it looked like only three people had shown up for the party scene, but eventually Geoff's friends pulled through and we ended up with nearly double that. We were also hoping to have more drunk zombies and fill the streets with passed out party people, but it ended up just being me and Geoff.

Some more fun facts:

It turns out that in late December the sun only rises at about 8am, and a Highgate high street at 8am on a Sunday is still a pretty busy place. Those three shots are pretty much the only shots we had of empty-looking streets, and even then they're a bit cheated. There's a lot of cropping and masking in this film, look out for any weird lines or funny patches of light or jump cuts where half the screen stays still and the other half moves slightly. Especially in the bedroom shots (Alex you're a lovely guy, but you really can't hold a reflector still. You owe me 4 hours of sleep).

Alessandro says that some of this was the worst stuff he's ever been asked to do. There's some good outtakes of him in the Zardoz costume (we should have got a fake ponytail and moustache) while I try and get him to say "THE PENIS IS EVIL, THE PENIS SHOOTS LIFE" in a Scottish accent (later on I realised that isn't the right line). Also it turns out hospital scrubs are pretty flimsy, even with jogging bottoms underneath, and winter is quite cold. Also when he pulled that tape off his chest he took a fair few chunks of skin with it, then thought we were joking when we said we wanted to do the shot again.

Ben from Candle Music delayed a date with a nice Swedish lady by like half an hour to do the music for this. Sorry Ben, hope it went well!

This is the second time I've ripped off the Awesome Face. It is truly an awesome face.

I was going to get up at 8am today and actually see what London was like, but I was too lazy and had a headache and was at a friend's house in a flat several stories above Brick Lane and it sounded like there were lots of people around anyway. I'd quite like to do this for 2012, it might be more appropriate.

Think that's all I can think of. Hope somebody somewhere likes the film, and if you do please pass it on.

Have a great Xmas and new year and general holidayness, I'm off to the Mojave Wastelands.


Thursday, 7 October 2010


You know how when a website or blog hasn't updated in ages, then suddenly the content creator leaves a post that claims that they haven't abandoned it?

Maybe they'll make a joke out of it and playfully say "I'm not dead!" like in Monty Python or they'll whine about not having enough time to do things or they'll make some vague comments about things they're working on and stuff that's definitely in the pipeline.
Whatever they do you'll feel angry and disappointed. They've let down the tiny amount of interest you ever felt for them and replaced it with tawdry promises you suspect they'll never keep. Their pathetic offerings and claims that things will be better sometime in the distant future leaves a nasty taste in your mouth, as do the feeling of raw lies and half-truths trying to stuff themselves violently into your eyes.

Well, guess what.


Someone told me they'd found this blog recently which made me realise that maybe I should give an update on stuff I've been doing. I'll try and be as chronological as I can.

Flash Theatre

Ages and ages and ages ago me and a guy called Dan (this guy called Dan) made a thing where I walked around in a raincoat and flashed members of the general public while he filmed it. It's waaaaay less sexy than it sounds.

I wasn't particularly happy with the end result and thought we could use a few more days filming and flashing, but for one reason or another we never got round to it. Eventually I gave him all the footage and my rough edit and asked if he could have a bash at doing a better edit. Some time later, he changed a few of the captions and dumped it online. I still think it could have been better if we'd had more time but it did pretty okay I guess. It got in the excellent Daily What, even if the only commenter wants to hit me.

TV Hat

This isn't exactly a thing. A guy I know called Paul became obsessed with a device known as TV Hat, an incredible invention which allows you to strap a handheld device to your head and watch it through a magnifying lens while looking functionally stylish as hell.

Finally the chance to make low budget Silent Hill/Mirrormask crossover porn

He wrote to the people who make TV Hat and said that if they gave him a free TV Hat he'd try to make something showing him wearing the TV Hat and the benefits that TV Hat would bring to his currently TV Hat-less existence. They liked this idea so much they sent him two TV Hats for free. It was a magical and revolutionary product at an unbelievable price. He asked me to help him make something showing the joys of a TV that is also a hat.

Originally I wanted to film a montage of him making the most of his TV Hat by doing all the sorts of things he might do while watching TV - laughing, crying, touching himself - in various public places. We tried using a series of binbags to fashion a makeshift robe surrounding his TV hat, to block out excess sunlight. We thought that he could hook it up to some kind of Wii gun and play shooting games as he walks around his neigbourhood. He chickened out of all of these things. Also we were running out of time or something. So instead we took some boring old photos and that was the end of it.


I'm not sure why I spent so long telling that story or why I put it above other bigger things, but there you are.

SD Proof Machine

I directed my first proper online video "viral" ad thingy, with the Viral Factory (who helped me make this previously). It was for a brand of SD card, and uses a very real, non-CGI setup that took several weeks of fun and pain to build. I made the nailhead baby myself! Pretty much everyone who saw it assumed that the card was just put on a greenscreen separately, which is slightly sad, because that certainly would have been easier and more sensible then actually building a rig for it to fit on a remote control car. This is what it looks like:

It's called "Memory Card Testing: Overkill Edition" on youtube, which to my mind isn't as catchy as "Proof Machine" but there you go

Huzzah, actual paid directing work! Speaking of which...

More MoFilm

Those of you with both a knowledge of things happening in London and a fully functioning scrollbar may notice that


MoFilm are making good on their promise, and will be showing the film at one of their events on the afternoon of this coming Tuesday the 26th (it's a private event as one of their competitions and apparently sold out). However, by a strange but not completely terrible twist of irony, I actually can't make the showing because of some other filmmaking directory stuff. I'm doing preproduction things on a proper work-type job and am urgently required to watch and rate some kind of explosion at the exact time that the film is being shown. This is not ideal, but at least I'll hopefully be doing something else that's cool instead of going to a dentist's appointment or having my knees removed or something.


The Cornwall Film Festival/Box[ur]shorts

A few months ago I finished a short film. I spent a lot of time working on it and I'm quite proud of it, even if it is slightly too long. Look, here's a random still from it:

And another, screaming!

Maybe she's SCREAMING at the claw thing! Maybe she's YELLING at someone! Maybe she's just FURIOUSLY YAWNING? Who knows! Exciting drama!

I've been holding off sticking it on the youtubes as I was trying to go for the festival circuit first and a lot of those have rules about not having things on the internet and suchlike. Its first screenings at two of these festivals are both coming very soon and happening right now! It will play on Saturday the 6th of November at the Cornwall Film Festival in Falmouth, in the morning as part of The Edge shorts competition . It's also being shown as part of "Box[ur]shorts", a festival that involves putting all the films in public jukeboxes and showing them in special locations all over the world. That's happening right now, and will continue travelling around for a while, so if you're anywhere near one go see it! Or just go to Falmouth at that one day or one time! Or look out for the next festival it will hopefully be shown at! Whatever happens you should watch it in some public space instead of huddled over your computer, film festivals and going outside are both fun. I'll certainly be at the Cornwall one and will hopefully be at many others.

Watch my film oh god please watch my film

Other things

Other things are slowly happening whenever I have time to work on them. The actual work film will almost certainly erupt in the next few months, but personal things are squeezed in between stuff like that. When I make stuff for no-one with no fixed deadline I tend to spend much more time messing around on them, perhaps more than I should. I just always feel a vague sense of disappointment when things are finally done, so the next time I make something I try to spend even more time trying to correct everything, but then when I finally stick it online I just think "holy crap I spent that long worrying about a video of me dancing in my underwear what the hell is wrong with me". I had a point to this somewhere, can't remember now.

Honorary Mention

A friend of mine called Nic Lamont, who some might remember from the 2012 London Olympics Logo film, has popped up acting in a controversial viral for a climate change thing. It was put up on the site, then very quickly taken down again with lots of apologies, but is still being reuploaded elsewhere by many other people, so although whether it works as an ad is very debatable it's certainly very successful as a viral. It's written by Richard Curtis funnily enough, maybe he's trying to shed his friendly Notting Hill-type image and establish himself as more of a guy who ain't nothing to fuck with.

I'm trying to learn photoshop maybe you noticed

Anyway she only had a small part in it as an office lady who gets covered in the blood of her slaughtered wind turbine-hating coworker, but by some twist of fate and magic she's sometimes in the youtube embed thumbnail things!

The guy next to her also seems surprised to see her there. Like, genuinely horrified.

Surely if you're an actor being in the youtube thumbnail must give you extra points on CVs and stuff. I don't know.

I think that's everything I have to say for now.


Tuesday, 29 June 2010

Nokia MiniMo competition


This is a long story, I'm starting from the beginning and trying to give as complete an account as possible, so I've dated it for all the TL:DRers. Sorry I haven't written this all up earlier by the way.

February 2009:

With lots of other people I co-made a film called Forrest Gump in One Minute, in One Take. It looks like this:

(If you click on the video it will take you to the Youtube page with full credits.)

June 19th-21st 2010:

A guy called Lee Moore/Chibihobo messaged me on Twitter (I didn't see it for a few days):

You can see the film he was talking about by clicking here, allegedly it's made by a lady called Jemma Lyon.

It's almost identical to our version. Same ideas, same script, same shooting style. The biggest difference is that none of us made it.

I wasn't sure how to react. If it had just been on Youtube or something I'd have been completely flattered. But someone had done this for a competition, and won something called a "Critic's Choice Award" , for which they received these:

So it based on ours, and it had been entered it into a competition alongside lots of other people's totally original film entries, then won a trip to Cannes, £600 and £1300 of film equipment.

This all seemed a bit unfair.

I thought the competition organisers might want to know about all this, so I left a comment on their website:

And I sent some strongly worded messages to them on Twitter:

(The tearoom voucher was technically an award and I completely forgot that Why I Don't Like Cellars won a Silver Award here. I think the chocolate train was from a raffle and it was so beautiful I left it in the fridge till someone binned it.)

Nokia's response, both to me and to other people who'd messaged them saying the same thing, wasn't very positive.

This was extremely frustrating.

At about midnight, I asked what they thought...

Sorry for angry words and swears, but I was pissed off about the whole thing. I got a fair bit of support, lots of people suggesting I email Nokia's press office, Jemma Lyon's university, etc. In the end I didn't do any of that, just decided to deal with it tomorrow and went to bed.

June 22nd:

Next time I checked, internets had been happening.

My followers on Twitter had jumped from about 30 to about 100 with lots of messages of support, Adrants had run a story on it, as did Ad Age, Mobile News and lots of other sites, and Nokia was getting a load of complaints. They quickly responded by saying it was the fault of their partners, MoFilm.

MoFilm quickly moved to do something about it. They messaged me on Twitter, got my number, gave me a ring, and generally dealt with all this in a nice professional way. They stuck a full apology on their blog:

And Nokia followed suite in a less name mentiony way, (although I got a name check on their Twitter).

So the prizes were revoked and also our One Minute One Take version got a showing at the London Film Festival! All sounded like a pretty good result to me.

And the next day the Telegraph wrote an article about it and somebody interviewed me for the Liverpool Echo and Daily Post, which was weird. All cool though!

Hell yeah internet! B3ta and Twitter are awesome lovely places!

June 23rd-28th:

Except more and more and more keeps unfolding about this thing. Manic from Bloggerheads, messaged me on B3ta suggesting that Nokia actually helped to make this other film to boost up their entries, then hoisted the blame on Jemma when it all went wrong (he's written an excellent blog about this whole thing, although I disagree with him about the other entries, some of them are very good).

I thought this was all getting a bit conspiracy theoryish. I mean I know that lots of companies asking for user generated content make a few of their own to boost up the numbers, but if you're going to do that, you don't let those ones win. Especially if you've got a fair few other entries. And especially if that film's totally nicked from something else they've seen on the internet.

Then Nokia admitted that yeah, to a certain extent they did that:

I asked Nokia what that meant, and they sent me a private message saying that all this representative had done was to lend his phone to film it and say it would be alright to enter it.

Then Jemma Lyon started speaking out. She posted statements to Adrants and the Nokia competition , and I think emailed Hello You Creatives, saying this:

“I would like to make a statement regarding the alleged plagiarism accusations from the Nokia Minimo movie competition.

I was approached by a Nokia representative who asked me to remake any video in under two minutes for his Nokia assignment. I was unaware that this was a competition at the time and did not receive a brief. The representative also promised to give me a mobile phone in exchange for assisting him with his project. I never received the phone.

The Nokia representative was present during the filming of my video and after being asked several times if the film was OK to submit he insisted it was and persisted to show the actors the original video to direct them where to stand and what to do. At no point did the representative inform any of the people involved that the film was breaching the terms and conditions and I was led to believe that the entry was valid.

Further to this, Nokia became aware that my entry was based on another video three days prior to sending me on the trip to Cannes, but they still sent me on the trip and refused to act until the public outcry.

My name has been tarnished by this event. I have been branded a cheater amongst many other things too awful to write and I have yet to be informed of how Nokia aim to rectify this. I aspire to pursue a career in the creative media industry and this libel is a great hindrance to my progress to achieving the career I want. My efforts to expose the truth have been greatly subdued by Nokia and the rule of law seems not to apply to large powerful corporations in certain instances.

In conclusion, I would like to reiterate that basing my video on Mr Tribble’s creative work was done in ignorance. I was not aware that I was breaking any rules and the Nokia representative never informed me that I was doing so. I previously had no interest in submitting an entry but I was misled into thinking that I was merely helping the Nokia representative, he has since personally apologised to me for the way I have been treated.

Nokia has allowed my name to be dragged through the mud by shrouding the situation with half truths and even some out right lies in order to save their own reputation.”

Finally, I got to talk to her myself over Facebook.

First I asked her exactly what happened, and whether this rep was from Nokia or MoFilm:

Then I asked if she'd name this representative so I could speak to him:

Then when I explained that MoFilm had sorted most of this out, she said this:


So, overall Jemma is claiming that this Nokia guy is almost entirely responsible for making the film, all she did was shoot it for him and stick it into the competition under his directions, and Nokia didn't send her back from Cannes, they just told MoFilm they had.

1st July:

I've just had a phone chat with a guy from Nokia's PR team (Mark who runs their Twitter), and this was his stance:

- This Nokia rep was a part-time employee from their street team, who specialise in doing Nokia-related things in universities, etc.

- He was present at the filming and lent his phone. He knew that the film was a lot like our one, but said she should enter it anyway. However he had nothing to do with the planning, directing or editing of it.

- Jemma was sent back on the earliest flight it was safe to send her on, on Thursday morning (she was meant to leave on either Friday or Saturday, he couldn't remember off the top of his head).

So all in all, I'm not sure what happens next and I have no idea who to believe. I don't know whether Jemma was left to be the fall girl by Nokia or whether there's been a load of misunderstandings.

It's fantastic that our film is being shown at the LFF, but I still think this whole thing has been a complete mess of confusion and half truths. I'd still like to know what's actually happened, and I think a lot of other people would as well. And even if Nokia's version of events is true (and I'm not saying they are for sure), they have suffered a massive breakdown in communication between members of their own staff. I don't necessarily think they should be holding individuals responsible - there's something very underhand about the whole thing.

Thanks again to everyone from Twitter and B3ta and the internet in general, thanks to everyone who blogged about this, I'm going to stick links to all the ones I've seen below, if anyone else has written anything else give me a message. I'm still hoping to find out more, and if I do I'll update.


Blogs/articles I haven't already mentioned:

Film Utopia - thought I'd put this at the top as it raises some interesting points. This whole thing is dealing with remakes of remakes; without Forrest Gump the movie we wouldn't have our low budget parody to begin with. Although I'd argue that Michel Gondry wasn't the only person to ever remake a big budget movie using low budgets cardboard special effects (see Son Of Rambow, which came out around the same time as Be Kind Rewind, by ex-Adam and Joe director Garth Jennings), he was an influence of ours. I think my main problem was that Forrest Chump won for its supposedly innovative ideas for representing a famous film, without whoever created it admitting that these ideas came entirely from our film. Maybe if they'd just said that theirs was based on Forrest Gump and this silly Youtube remake of Forrest Gump in the first place it would have been different.

Moments of Film (giving a nice example of a film competition gone right)

Reputation Online (another interesting take on events)

Blogs/articles I've already mentioned

Wednesday, 12 May 2010

Art installation thingy mentioned on Spoonfed

Look! Right here!

The sign they mention was actually very silly and tongue in cheek, as to be honest I thought the eye was more of a fun thing to play with than something menacing. But I'm glad they like it.

Not much else to say really.


Wednesday, 5 May 2010

Project Friendly - 2

Michaela sent me an email:

Hi Will,

Thank you very much for your fantastic envelope!

I wanted to let you know that I spent my morning putting this beast together and here (attached) is the finished result!!


IT WORKS! IT REALLY WORKS! I was worried for a minute that she had photoshopped it instead of actually making it, but she's confirmed that she did make it, just photoshopped out all the cut-out lines and stuff. This is extra impressive, and clearly Michaela is the greatest kind of person. I predict big biscuits in her future, oh yes indeed...

Also you can see the neater photos she's taken at

Wooooooooot! Another hooray for Michaela!

[Edit: what happened to Blogger linking to big versions of pictures? Here's a slightly bigger one, looking much more exciting and dramatic: ]

Friday, 30 April 2010

Project Friendly

A man I know called Dan is part of a thing called called Project Friendly which involves sending anonymous people envelopes with drawings on them and stuff. You can put whatever you like inside them, as long as the envelope is decorated in some way.

It sounded fun, and after a very long delay, I've got involved in this business:

Okay so my idea is that this is the front side, and you're like "huh this is a pretty fake hairy envelope but no big deal, what's with the scissors around the sides" but then you turn it round and BAM:

You were holding a folded up monster in your hands and you didn't even know!
What does this mean?

Just in case Michaela has little experience with cutout things or thinks the dotted lines are some weird art style thing I put some instructions inside:

I'm not really sure where I was going with the links. I just thought they might be useful. I had a slightly longer list but I kept misspelling the URLs, so I ripped out that bit, and then I was like "sod it, I've written this much and writing is hard, I might as well do little rips everywhere and pretend it is a weird art style thing".

I coloured in the front last, after I'd done the little scissors, then felt bad about it. Maybe Michaela might prefer a full colour envelope monster and not really care about the white patches and the scissors round the side. I better leave detailed instructions in case she wants to find the same colour and go over those bits.


I hope Michaela actually does it. I hope Michaela actually does it and it actually works. I'd like to see the results.

You can see some more Project Friendlies scattered around on and . Personally I think there should be a Flickr page so they could get more people involved. Maybe I'll poke Dan with a stick and tell him that.


Friday, 16 April 2010

Art installation - part 2

Filmed it on the opening night. It seems to work pretty well.

It's open over the weekend, but it closes some time around 2PM on Tuesday.



Wednesday, 14 April 2010

Doing a video art installation, come and see it!


Me and an exciting computer researcher called Tom Haines have made a video installation for an art show! Neither of us have been in a proper exhibition before, it's exciting!

I'm not sure if I should say what it is yet, but it's quite a fun simple looking thing and it interacts with you. It's quite small, hidden away in the corridor of an attractive central London crypt, but maybe you might like it? It's also part of a bigger art show, so there'll be lots of other stuff to look at, like paintings and sculptures and photos and a performance artist. Also there's the natural excitement of being in a crypt to deal with. And it's in this church, which I've often passed and wondered about:

Intriguing, right? Bet you'd want to see the crypt of that place, bet there's zombies and cult people and secret rooms full of Victorian gentlemen plotting to destroy the Empire. I like St Pancras, they still appreciate the value of random Gotham Cityish giant statues round those parts.

The exhibition is "Caged Bird Sings", the website for it is, and the website for the gallery is It's at St Pancras Church, which for some reason is literally right across the road from Euston station rather than St Pancras station, and it's on Euston Road. It's the one that looks like the photo, and if you go round the back of it there's a stairway to the crypt. Last time I was there there was a huge banner saying "THIS WAY TO THE CRYPT", but I'm not sure how long that's staying up.

It's free entry, it's on from Thursday the 15th to Tuesday the 20th of this month including the weekend. On most days it's open between 12:30 and 6pm, but on Thursday there's a special magic party viewing instead between 6pm and 9pm where there will be a limited amount of free ART WINE™! It says "private viewing" on the crypt site but you read this, come to that and tell them you're my cousin or secret lover or something. Am I allowed to say that? Maybe! Me and Tom will be hanging around the one on Thursday, I might come back at the weekend to check it's still working, but you should come whenever you're free, it's just an art thing, you go look at those whenever, long as it's open and stuff.

Come and see it! Come and see it! Please come and see it.


Sunday, 21 February 2010

Embracing the inevitable

Well not exactly inevitable, but necessary. Well not exactly necessary, but useful. Well not exactly useful, but oh forget it.


Maybe later I'll write what I had for breakfast or something.

Saturday, 13 February 2010

February 15th is Anti-Valentine's Day

Share it with that special someone.

(Made in my cellar very late at night with wine and copious amounts of lipstick. Bear voiced by Henry and played by Pinky, who had a passport once. Also lipsynching is more complicated than I thought).

Friday, 15 January 2010


Hey guys I was just a college cheerleader who gets soooo hot when I think aboout about TIGER WOODS SEX TAPE so I was searching online for TIGER WOODS SEX TAPE and guess what I found this HOT RUDE FURIOUS LEAKED ACTION and I was just like "OMG this just makes me so INSANELY EXCITED that I have to place it immediately on my blog website comments page for everyone at this website to see DANGEROUS ILLEGAL TIGER WOODS ACTION NOW


I probably should have put this here before it got set to EXTREME ADULT CONTENT on youtube.

Oh, and happy new decade and Christmas and things.

Special thanks to Laurie Newman for building the web page, and Joe Beaver and Alexandra Appell for their gif making.